Falling Down the Rabbit Hole
by anabeav87
Summary: Set soon after Bonnie became the anchor. Katherine will not be taking over Elena's body and Damon will not be injected. I'm not sure if any other characters besides Bonnie and Damon and made up characters will be making an appearance. Still a work in progress. First ever fanfiction. Please be nice. Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Diaries or any characters in it.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The idea of thanking Damon was not something I consciously thought about. We weren't friends…we weren't anything. We were just two people forced into a partnership because of circumstance and our love for a certain brunette beauty. Though I didn't necessarily hate him anymore I also didn't care about him and I believed the thought to be mutual until the day that Jeremy told him about my death. I stood behind Jeremy and watched as Damon's face crumbled and the awful truth was realized. I watched as he went through all five stages of grief. After that watching Damon handle my death became a fascination of mine. I was sure that it all stemmed from him wanting to shield Elena from pain but I noticed that he brought my grimoire to my funeral, that he came up with a plan to bring me back, that he destroyed a crate when he had to choose between Elena and I, that he snapped his brother's neck repeatedly, that he asked for Tessa's help, and that he begged Amara to live until I was on the other side. I saw it all and though it has now been over a month since I was brought back I still wonder what fueled Damon to do all of this. I haven't spoken of it and I have avoided Damon at all costs. But I can't anymore. I need help. A month with this pain has been unbearable so the idea of an eternity with it makes me want to jump off the nearest bridge. I've always been the strong one so to now admit defeat and especially to Damon will be hard but I know that if anyone can and will find a way to fix it he will. The tricky part is sneaking away to ask him without anyone finding out now that he and Elena are no longer together. I'm sure it will be seen as a traitorous act on my part if it comes out. So I wait until midterms, when I know that Caroline and Elena will be so swamped they won't notice if I disappear for a day or two and I make the journey to the Salvatore house to ask the devil for a favor. God have mercy on my soul.

*The devil can sometimes do a very gentlemanly thing. –Robert Louis Stevenson*


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you so much for the nice reviews! Here's chapter 2. I've already started working on the 3rd chapter. Hopefully you guys keep liking the story. I'll do my best to make the characters true to the ones on the show.

I'd been sitting in the car for fifteen minutes trying to talk myself into walking up to the door of the Salvatore mansion. I knew he knew I was there and was just waiting for me to grow the hell up and get out of the car…I knew he could hear my heartbeat. After a final big breath I opened the car door and placed my shaky feet on the ground and began the short walk to the front door. Damon already had the door open and merely nodded his head and moved back so I could enter the house.

"How goes it little witch?"

"I'm not a witch anymore Damon…you know that."

"Yeah…we should probably fix that."

I rolled my eyes as I walked ahead of him into the living room and whispered under my breath, "Yeah…so I can start saving _her _again."

I plopped down on the couch and smoothed out my navy blue maxi skirt as he went to the bar and poured himself some Jack. After a nice big gulp he turned to me and pinned me with his stare. I hated that stare. It always scared me, confused me, and excited me at the same time. He then lowered his head and stared into the amber liquid in his glass for what seemed like forever, like he was looking for the answers to the universe in it. He let out a huff like he finally decided on something, lifted his eyes to me again, and said, "Not everything I do is for Elena…like working my ass off to bring you back to the land of the living." The silence stretched between us for awhile…as he looked anywhere but me and as I tried desperately to pick up my jaw from the floor. "So why are you here, my oh so judgy one?"

I looked down at my folded hands in my lap to gather my courage and said under my breath "I need your help, Damon." What followed was complete silence. I waited for him to say something and after a full two minutes I looked up to find Damon staring intently at me. "Did you hear me Damon? I need your help." "I heard you…I just never thought you would say that to me and actually mean it." He turned around and set his glass on the bar and then turned back around with a sly smile and closed his eyes while saying, "Allow me to appreciate this moment for a minute, please." I shook my head, picked up my bag, and started walking to the front door. "I should have known I couldn't rely on you." By the time I made it to the front door he was already in front of me. "Bonnie, stop. I'll help you." "No, Damon you don't have to." "I want to. So…what's wrong?" "I can't take it anymore…" He looked at me with a quizzical life of his eyebrow. "Can't take what anymore? Baby Gilbert?" he said with a shit eating grin. I completely ignored that comment and looked him in the eye. "I'm in constant pain, Damon and I can't take it anymore. I feel their deaths…every single one and it's excruciating. I'm not strong enough for this. I need you to fix it, Damon. Please…" I finished my speech while my eyes filled with tears. After a full minute of him staring at me he finally responded with, "Go back to school. I'll find someone to fix this…I promise." With that he opened the door for me and I left without a backwards glance. Could I trust him to actually help? I wasn't Elena Gilbert after all and this had nothing to do with her…I was terrified that he like everyone else wouldn't fight for me…that I would once again be abandoned because I happened to not be a doppelganger. With that last thought I climbed in my car and headed back to Whitmore.

*Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them.* -Dalai Lama

I hadn't spoken to Damon in over two weeks…not since I left his house; neither had anyone else. After that day he packed a bag, got in his car, and disappeared. No one knew where he was and Stefan had even suggested that he had just skipped town and wouldn't be back. When he said it, it took everything in me not to react. Damon was all I had to get out of this hell and now he was gone. It was reaffirmed that all he cared about and all he would ever care about was Elena. I decided that being away from everyone was the best thing for me. I was depressed and I just couldn't be around anyone anymore. So I told everyone including Jeremy that I was spending the weekend packing up some of my dad's stuff and instead went there to hide out from the living for two days. I had been there all of three hours lying on the couch and watching a Will and Grace marathon when I passed out. I was exhausted. Having the spirits pass through me was hell and it took a lot out of me. I don't know how long I had been asleep…maybe 45 minutes before a loud, resounding knock came from the front door. I jumped awake and was instantly scared. I couldn't protect myself anymore and hadn't thought about that fact until now. I got up and slowly made my way to the front door and insistent knocks that seemed to never stop. Then I heard, "Come on Tituba, open the door!" I threw it open and stared in shock at a very wet Damon who had been standing in the storm waiting for me to let him in. He just huffed and brushed past me into the warm, inviting house. I was at a loss for words. "What are you doing here, Damon? Elena's not here…" He looked at me with a look that told me that he thought my comment was beyond stupid. "I know that. I'm here to see you." He plopped down on the couch and finished with, "You know to fix your problem." I felt my jaw slip open. "You're actually going to help me?" "I said I would. Why do you think I've been gone for two weeks?" He picked up my remote and started flipping channels before continuing, "It certainly wasn't a leisure trip!" I waited for him to finish but he said nothing and I started to get annoyed. I walked up and ripped the remote out of his hand and said in an agitated tone, "Well…how are you going to fix it?" He set back and sized me up. "The attitude really wasn't needed," he remarked. I started tapping my foot out of frustration. He raised an eyebrow and gestured to the stairs leading up to my bedroom before adding, "You should go up and pack and get a goodnight's sleep because we're leaving early in the morning."


	3. Chapter 3

I'm sorry for the delay. A lot of stuff is going on right now. So here is chapter 3. I made it a lot longer to go with the apology of it being late. I hope you guys enjoy it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Diaries or any characters from VD. If I did it would be a completely different show!

Chapter 3

I probably should have questioned Damon but instead by 9 in the morning I was dressed in a simple white dress, dark purple flats, and had overstuffed my overnight bag. The only perk of not having family was that I didn't have to leave a note for anyone about where I was going. I also didn't tell my friends or boyfriend. I truly didn't want to explain anything to them. I had barely gotten all the way down the stairs before there was pounding on my door. _Why couldn't he knock like a normal person! _

I threw open the door and pinned him with an annoyed look. "Do you think you could be any louder Damon?!" His mouth kicked up on the side in a cocky smile before responding, "I could try. Come on witchy let's go!" He reached inside and grabbed my bag before making his way to his car. I took a steady breath and tried not to think about the fact that I was leaving town with a psychopath and going to an unknown destination for an undetermined amount of time. I slowly closed and locked the door before making my way to the passenger side and climbing in without a second thought. Without looking at me Damon passed me a white mocha/cinnamon dolce combo (how he knew how I took my coffee I wasn't quite sure) and a small bag that contained a cheese danish before donning his aviators and backing out of my driveway.

We had been on the road for what seemed like forever but was probably actually only an hour. We hadn't said much to each other. I sat with my left leg curled underneath me while playing with the dial trying desperately to find something that would drown out the buzz of awkward silence. I settled on Ellie Goulding's 'I Know You Care.' I had always liked the song but as I actually started to pay attention to the words I became more and more uncomfortable. For some strange feeling all I could think was that this song was written for Damon and me. I looked at him from underneath my lashes to see if he was paying attention to the song and found his eyes already trained on me with a look of recognition. "What song is this?" He asked in a strained tone. "It's, um, I Know You Care by Ellie Goulding," I looked down at my dress and started picking at invisible strands, "Do you like it?" I was met with silence. I looked up and was awarded with that stare, the stare that could heat you up and cool you down at the same time. He slowly slid his sunglasses back over his eyes before whispering, "It seems familiar is all…"

I woke to Damon shaking my shoulder. I looked up at him with an annoyed expression. "What?!" He smirked and then replied, "Come on little witch. Time to eat!" I looked out of the window and was met with a sign for a local diner. I then checked my phone…we had been driving for at least nine hours. I was hungry, stiff, and tired. I had barely put my hand on the door handle before Damon was opening the door for me. I hadn't expected Damon to come with me but he followed close behind and sat down across from me in the booth before motioning for the waitress to wait on us. The waitress was a tall, gorgeous blond without an ounce of fat on her and stormy grey eyes that were hungry for Damon. The way she stared at him made me believe she could see right into the inner workings of his mind, however, Damon seemed oblivious to this and just motioned at me to order.

"Can I get the turkey, cheddar, sprout sandwich and pumpkin soup, please? With a coke."

Though she wrote down my order her eyes never left Damon's perfect bone structure. He finally lifted those cerulean orbs to look at her and I saw her jump back slightly like she had been burned. He gave her a dazzling smile that was created to make the recipient feel safe but I could see the animal behind that display.

"Can I just get a coffee?" She nodded her head and he added, "Thank you," before she turned on her heel like in a trance to put in our orders.

I chuckled under my breath and Damon lifted an eyebrow in question. "You really don't understand the hold you have over girls do you?"

In a completely serious tone he replied, "Oh I do…I just don't care. Plus it doesn't work on every girl." He tilted his head to the side like a lizard studying their prey. "It never worked on you."

"That's because I know you are just a demon with skin." I answered sweetly before I started drinking the coke that the waitress had finally brought. I waited for a smart ass comment but all Damon said was, "I think we're just going to get a hotel room here tonight and then continue on our way in the morning."

I looked at him dumbfounded. "Why?"

"Because I'm tired and don't feel like driving anymore and you aren't allowed to touch my car." He smiled sweetly before adding, "Don't worry Bon Bon I won't touch…not unless you beg."

I made a disgusted expression. "Where are we going anyway, Damon?"

"Massachusetts"

"What? Why?"

All he responded with before he began to drink his coffee and ignore me was, "Salem."

I wandered around the lobby as Damon got us a hotel room. It was a really nice hotel and I didn't really understand why he would book such a nice place for one night but the thought of a nice, warm bed squashed my suspicions. In no time he was leading me to the elevator and we were riding up to the 9th floor. We were both silent but it was a comfortable silence that I thoroughly enjoyed. He opened the door for me and I immediately walked in before stopping short in shock.

"Damon…..why is there only one bed?" I asked as I turned to him slowly.

He walked past me to deposit the bags on the bed. "It was all they had. I'm going to take a shower. Get comfortable and order whatever you want." With that he grabbed his bag and walked into the bathroom. I stared at the closed door with my mouth hanging open before closing the bedroom door softly and sitting on the bed still in shock.

He had been in the shower probably a good 15 minutes while I flipped through all 200 channels searching for something, anything to distract me from the situation I was in. I had already received two calls from Jeremy and a text from Caroline…I ignored both of them. It just seemed easier. I was really into some low budget horror movie by the time the bathroom door opened. I looked up out of habit and froze…there were droplets of water running down his forehead and he was naked except for the low hanging towel on his narrow hips. He was gorgeous and it almost pained me to admit it.

"Stare any harder judgy and you'll burn my towel right off." I dropped my eyes immediately. He chuckled at my response and motioned towards the bathroom. "You can go ahead and take a shower if you want. I'm done." I quickly gathered my things and rushed into the room without making eye contact with him. Once in the bathroom I relaxed a bit and met my own green eyes in the mirror. As I looked at myself I started contemplating what I was doing. I was entrusting Damon with so much…the thought was almost laughable considering our past relationship but for some reason I now trusted him slightly more than anyone else in our group. He was strong, capable, and insanely protective and I now knew that I meant something to him outside of his relationship with Elena. My fear of him was gone and strangely enough I now was curious about who he was underneath the cold-like, predator exterior. I shook off the thoughts plaguing my mind and hopped in the shower while simultaneously wondering how this sleeping arrangement would work.

I slipped on a pair of black leggings, polka dot socks, and an oversized green t-shirt and walked out of the bathroom with a pseudo-like confidence. The room was in total blackness save a low light on the nightstand beside what I presumed was my side of the bed. Damon was already in bed and appeared to be sleeping. I didn't even question myself…I just climbed into bed beside him and turned off the light. A few seconds later I felt the bed shift as Damon turned towards me. He stayed silent but I could feel him intently watching my face. I finally gave up the struggle and turned on my side, facing him completely.

"Damon?"

"Yes little bird?"

I smiled at the nickname though I didn't ask what this one meant.

"Can I ask you something?"

I felt as well as heard his sigh. "Yes…"

"Why did you fight so hard to bring me back to life?"


	4. Chapter 4

Ok so here is chapter 4. I am so sorry it took so long for me to update this story. Life got really bad all at once and I had to abandon this story for a little bit. I'm back and I'm hoping I can update on a regular basis. I have also started another story post 5x22 about Damon and Bonnie returning from the other dimension. It'll go up soon but I want to get a little further into it before I post it. Thank you to everyone for being patient with me and I hope you like this new chapter. So sorry again!

Chapter 4

I felt him tense up as if he was holding his breath. At first he said nothing…just continued to stare at me. I had almost given up on receiving an answer when he finally spoke.

"Why do you think I did it?"

"Damon no one else will know about this. Just tell me the truth…please."

He waited a few seconds and then said, "The idea of you not being in this world really bothered me…so I fixed it."

"Why?"

"Because Elena needed you." I nodded my head and was about to accept the obvious answer when I heard him whisper, "Because I needed you."

"You needed me?"

"Yes."

I nodded my head enthusiastically. "Ok."

"That's all you're going to say?"

"What am I supposed to say?"

"Aren't you wondering why?"

"Yes but I know you aren't really ready to tell me….."

He went silent but I could still feel his eyes on me. Then in a low voice he said, "Do you still love Jeremy?"

"Do you still love Elena?"

"I don't think that really matters…we aren't together anymore. Now…do you still love Baby Gilbert?"

"He's all I've ever known. He was my first love and he was there for me through my months of being a ghost. And he's there for me now….."

"So…no."

"I didn't say that."

"You basically did."

I exhaled slowly before I admitted the truth. For some reason the veil of darkness convinced me that my secrets would remain safe and trapped in this room. "No…I don't still love him but the idea of having no one love me terrifies me. I don't have anyone left that loves me, Damon. He's all I've got so I've decided to live in feigned bliss."

"You have me…"

We both went still. It was a big thing to admit and neither of us wanted to examine what it meant. Both of us simultaneously turned on our sides, our backs touching, and decided to let sleep save us from a conversation that had been begging to be had for years.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

I woke to my phone vibrating on the nightstand beside me. It was clearly morning and it was clear that I was the only person in the room. I finally reached over and grabbed my phone. I looked at the display and was met with Caroline's name.

"Hello"

"Finally you answer the phone! Where have you been?"

"What do you mean where have I been?"

"Elena and I came by yesterday to cheer you up and you weren't there but your car still was. Today…same thing! So, where are you?"

"I'm, um…well I'm…" I knew avoiding the truth was a waste of time. Somehow everyone would eventually find out so I grew a pair and told her what was going on. "I'm out of town with Damon."

The other end was silent. "Hello? Care, are you still there?"

"Yeah…I'm just not understanding what you just said to me. Why are you with Satan's spawn?"

"I'm having some troubles with the whole anchor thing and he's taking me to someone that can fix it."

"Why him? Why not Stefan?"

"I didn't ask Stefan. I asked Damon."

As if on cue Damon entered the hotel room carrying coffee and donuts for me assumed. I gave him a tense smile letting him know that the conversation I was in was less than desired. He mouthed at me _Who? _and I rolled my eyes before mouthing back _Caroline._ I expected him to leave then but instead he set the donuts in front of me, the coffee on the nightstand, and pulled up a chair to the bed to enjoy the rest of the show.

"You asked him?!" She shrilled in my ear.

"Yes Care I asked him."

"Why?" I could tell she was impatient and getting madder at me by the minute.

I wracked my brain for an answer but finally settled for the truth. "I knew that he would fix it."

I waited for a reprimand but instead I got, "Elena's gonna be pissed, you know that Bonnie."

"I do but I've been suffering and I refuse to do it any longer. She'll just have to understand."

"Suffering? What do you mean?"

I made eye contact with Damon whose face remained expressionless. "Look Care I have to go. I'll talk to you later." Before she could say anything I hung up.

Damon continued to study me. I decided to address the elephant in the room. "I'm sorry Elena's going to find out about this. She'll see it as a betrayal and I don't know how that will affect her taking you back. I can call Care back and ask her not to say anything."

I expected a lot of different reactions but mostly him confessing that he needed Elena to not be mad at him about this and for me to please convince Care to keep quiet but instead all he said was, "I don't care if Vampire Barbie tells her. Get up and get dressed, we have big plans today!" With that he walked out to give me some privacy. He wasn't upset…he seemed to be in an almost pleasant mood. It made me uncomfortable and weary but I did as he said and made my way downstairs to meet him at the car.

I got in the car, put on my seatbelt, and waited for him to pull off but he continued to sit there in his black jeans, black boots, black v-neck and aviators staring out of the windshield at nothing.

"Damon? Are we leaving sometime soon?"

He continued to look out at the highway like it held all the answers of the world then after a few seconds, like he had just realized I said something, he slowly turned towards me. He removed his glasses and made eye contact with me.

"Bonnie…I need you to trust that I have your best interests at heart."

"Ok…"

"I mean it. I need you to believe me that everything that happens is for you and that you can trust me completely."

"What's going on Damon?"

"You just might not like what you have to do to fix your anchor problem….."

"What do I have to do, Damon?" I could hear the panic in my voice but I couldn't calm down.

"You'll find out when we get there." He slid his glasses back on and put the car in gear before adding, "Just please wait till we get there."

I didn't fight though every instinct was telling me to. For some reason I knew it was for the best and that I could trust him. I let out a huff and settled back in my seat for the long drive ahead.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

We had been driving for at least forty five minutes when I realized that I knew nothing about Damon. I was more than a little curious of who he was sans Elena.

"Damon?"

He turned his head quickly like I had startled him. Any other person would have been uncomfortable but I didn't even flinch. He took off his sunglasses and slid them onto his shirt.

"Yeah?"

"Who did you want to be…you know before you met Katherine?"

He looked stunned. It was obvious that he never expected that type of question from me.

"Why are you asking me this?"

"I'm just curious…."

"Hmmm. Well um I wanted to be anyone but my father."

"I'm being serious, Damon."

"I know you are. And I meant what I said." He shrugged like it was no big deal but I could tell that this subject was important and that I had to watch my reaction or he would never let me in again. I kept quiet and waited him out. "Look, Stef, was the favorite. I was, for a lack of a better word, a disappointment. I didn't want to be some businessman trying to lead the wealthy of the world into more wealth. I just wanted to be worthy…" He went quiet and still like he couldn't believe he had admitted that to me.

"I understand that," I said under my breath.

"You do?"

"Of course. All of my friends had family and boyfriends and I had no one. And I guess all I ever wanted really was to be worthy of someone."

"Yeah." He nodded his head slowly. "Bon?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think you ever will be…worthy?"

"I sincerely hope so.

He nodded his head and stared out at the approaching road. He was obviously in deep thought and I didn't want to disturb him. Before I knew it we were turning down a long drive way lined in magnolia trees. We pulled up to an old but beautiful white Victorian house. After putting the car in gear and shutting it off he turned to me.

"So I'm guessing you're wondering where we are?"

"Yeah…" I turned and looked around for any sign of life but saw none.

"This house belongs to a very old witch named Eleanor. She's older than me…probably around Katherine's age. She's extremely powerful and willing to help you."

"Why?"

"According to her, Bennett magic belongs in the world and your body can carry it."

"Um…ok."

"So just be open to what she has to say and don't be shocked when you see her."

With that he jumped out of the car. I sat there contemplating what would shock me about her appearance, except for her obviously being very old, but he already had my door open, motioning for me to step out. As we approached the front door the magic coming from the house became almost suffocating. Damon locked eyes with me to reassure me that everything would be fine before he lifted his hand and gently knocked on the door. I lifted an eyebrow and reasoned that this witch must be really powerful if Damon was watching how he was acting. The door opened to reveal a petite girl with medium colored brown skin, straight black hair down her back and with eyes so dark and big they resembled shark eyes. She was gorgeous but also disconcerting in a way. She looked no older than 22 and completely innocent in a white cotton knee length dress with a dark blue belt and no shoes. A sweet smile graced her lips.

"Hello. Can I help you?"

Damon tilted his head to the side and studied the young woman. "Hello Eleanor."

The smile dropped from her face and she lifted an expressive eyebrow. "Damon Salvatore. It's about time you showed up. Please come in."

She moved back to let us in. I tried to contain my expression but my face showed the shock that I felt. Eleanor just chuckled, closed the front door, and ushered us into the kitchen. We took our seats at the island and Eleanor sat two cups of lemonade in front of us. She smiled at me before extending her arm to me.

"Hello Bonnie. It's nice to meet you."

I immediately took her hand and felt a huge jolt of power work its way up my arm. I looked at her in shock and blurted out what I had been thinking. I couldn't contain my curiosity anymore.

"How old are you?"

Eleanor threw her head back and laughed. "I like you Bonnie. I am in fact about 480 give or take a year."

"How do you look so young?"

"Reincarnation. It's a long story and not the reason you're here. Correct?"

Damon responded before I could ask any more questions. "Correct."

"Cool. So how about we go in the living room and get started."

She proceeded to exit the kitchen, expecting us to follow. She already had the floor set up with candles and a weird symbol on the floor. "Both of you sit down and join hands."

"I don't understand how this is going to help me…"

"Well I'm actually performing two spells. I'm going to return your powers. You deserve to have them. I have seen the greatness you can do with those powers. Though I do not appreciate what you have done with them in the past, I am confident that now you will only do what is best with them. I'm also going to link you to death. If you are constantly linked to death then the pain of supernatural deaths will not affect you. Your pain will be no more." By that point she had finished pouring a pink powder around Damon and me and had lit the candles surrounding us.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to be too noisy but how are you going to do this."

She chuckled at me like a child who asked questions every five minutes. "It's ok to be noisy. I am about to perform spells on you." She stood as closely to the circles as she could get and lifted her arms making the flames rise higher. "I'm going to call out to your magic. It lingers and all it truly wants to do is return to your body. Magic is attached to the soul so it does not matter that your body died. It is out in the universe…all it needs is to be called. It is an easy spell and should take no time at all. The second spell is a little more involved. You and Damon will have to share blood. I will form a bond that will last as long as you both exist. You will then literally be bonded to death. Do you understand?"

My mouth had fallen open and I was sure I had stopped breathing. I looked at Damon and he looked slightly ashamed that he had kept it from me. "This is how you are going to help me, Damon?" I was pissed and it showed.

"This is the only way, Bonnie. I searched for two weeks for anything else and this is all I could find. You have to trust me."

"Damon we have always hated each other. We don't have good history…I can't be tied to you for eternity."

"I don't hate you. I have saved you and gone to the ends of the earth for you and now I just want to be there for you and help you again. You can trust me…I promise."

I dropped my eyes from his face and thought through everything. Damon was my best option and he had never let me down. I slowly nodded my head. I looked up to Eleanor. "Ok. I'm ready."

"Good. Join hands and hold on." Her smile lifted on side in a cocky smile and she began to chant and I began to feel the power sweep through my body before the world around me went black.


	5. Chapter 5

So I don't even know if anyone is still interested in this story but yeah…I wrote a new chapter. I hope everyone likes it. This is kind of just a filler to get Bonnie and Damon to the next stage…who knows what's to come? ;)

Btw I disclaim. I disclaim the characters and the general plot of Vampire Diaries and I disclaim any other shit they can sue me for!

Chapter 5

I came to with a start and looked around. I was still sitting in the same spot and Damon was watching me with a concerned look. I had only been incoherent for a few seconds but I could already feel my magic stretching in my body trying to get comfortable. I finally felt whole again. I looked up and locked eyes with Eleanor giving her a sincere smile.

"Ok Bonnie it's time to bond the two of you." I gave a slight grimace although I was very grateful for what she was doing. She turned to Damon and motioned for his hand before slicing deeply into the palm. I gulped in air and made peace with what I was about to do. He lifted his hand and I latched onto it and drank as much as I could before the wound closed. I swore I heard a muffled moan but when I looked up at Damon his demeanor hadn't changed…cold and emotionless. After I was done I pulled back, wiped a droplet from the corner of my mouth and refused to make eye contact again with Damon. Eleanor then turned towards me. "Bonnie it would be easier for him to bite you. I'm sure you have already figured that out." I nodded my head enthusiastically. Damon cleared his throat and our eyes met. "Which would you prefer? The neck or the wrist." Without answering him I tilted my neck up for him. Before I knew it he had pulled my onto his lap; I instinctively wrapped my legs around him. We stared each other down and then he slowly turned my head to the right before lowering his cool lips to my burning neck. He kissed it at leisure and I clutched his shoulders. At some point Eleanor had left the room and it was just Damon and I as he basically made love to my neck. Moans and gasps had started to escape my mouth as my hands got lost in his hair. All rational thought had left my head and I didn't question what we were doing or why we were doing it. Eventually my bones felt like liquid and that's when his fangs sunk in. I gasped and gripped his shoulders harder before letting my head fall back to give him more access. It felt amazing. I felt like our souls were melding into one. I knew that this was the spell…it was making us into one being. All too soon I felt his fangs pull out of my neck. He pulled back and stared at me. I knew that a line had been crossed but there was no point in exploring it…once we made it back to Mystic Falls and Elena got over her betrayal she would take him back and it would be like nothing had happened at all. I lowered my head and quickly climbed off his lap. He stood and after collecting our belongings we made our way to the door and Eleanor. She smiled a smile that held too many secrets and asked could she speak to me alone. Damon lifted an already arched brow before nodding and exiting the house without even a goodbye.

She swept her hand in a circular motion and uttered some Latin under her breath to put the house in a blanket of silence before turning back to me. Then motioning to the kitchen she began to walk ahead of me. I sat once again at the island and she sat a steaming cup of tea in front of me before also taking a seat.

"So Bonnie…let's chat."

"Ok…about what exactly?"

She lifted her eyebrow and her mouth lifted to one side. It was the perfect example of a shit eating grin.

"I think you know."

"I don't want to discuss Damon."

"We're going to anyway, though. Aren't we?"

I sat my tea back down on the island and nodded my head in defeat.

"I'll just say what I have to say and then you can be on your way. Alright?"

I nodded once again but still didn't lift my head to look at her.

"Stefan and Elena are not the only couple destined to be together. The spirits know quite a lot Bonnie and they knew that one day you would come along and soon after that you and Damon would meet. Of course Elena is a wrench in the plan but that will sort itself out. Ok?"

She touched my shoulder and I looked up at her with a watery smile.

"Damon doesn't love me and I don't love him. I'm sorry to disappoint you Eleanor."

She smiled sweetly. "Yet. Now come on, Damon's waiting."

I got up and made my way to the door. But before exiting I turned back and hugged her goodbye. She may have looked my age but her soul and wisdom reminded me of my grandmother. She patted my back, whispered goodbye, and then closed the door softly behind her. The passenger door was already opened for me. I climbed in and Damon automatically pulled off. We were now on the way back to the real world. I had no idea what was in store but I knew one thing: I had to pretend that everything was the same. I was with Jeremy and soon Damon would be with Elena again. That was how it was meant to be.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

_Hands sliding against the soft flesh of my thigh as they made their way to my hot core. Pale hands that wanted to bring me ultimate pleasure. My back arched as two fingers slid inside of me. The only word I could mutter was his name, 'Damon.'_

Someone was shaking me awake. My eyes popped open and I looked out of the window at the boarding house. I turned to Damon who sat quietly watching me.

"Damon, why are we at the boarding house?"

"Because you have vampire blood in your system and we don't need an accident screwing up the fact that we finally have a witch again. Come on I'll show you your room."

He exited the car, grabbed my bag, and walked into the house without a backward glance. And just like that everything was back to normal. Tomorrow I would return to Whitmore and this whole trip would be just a memory.

I walked in the house and made my way into the living room where I heard voices. There stood Elena and Damon arguing.

"I was helping her Elena and I don't need to explain myself to you. We did nothing wrong."

"If that's true then you wouldn't have hidden it from me."

I cleared my throat and both vampires' heads whipped in my direction.

"Elena don't blame him. I asked for his help and I asked him not to say anything to anyone because I didn't want anyone to worry."

Damon gave me a quizzical look. He clearly didn't understand why I was basically lying to protect him.

"Bonnie why wouldn't you tell me you were in pain?" Elena asked as she approached me.

"I just didn't want you worrying and I knew that Damon had plenty of connections to fix the problem."

Elena turned her head to Damon and stared at him longingly. "Did the problem get fixed?"

"Yeah. No more pain and…" I snapped my fingers and the fireplace lit and every candle in the room came alive. I smiled a big fake grin and hugged her before whispering in her ear. "Forgive Damon. He helped me because I'm your friend. Ok?"

Elena hugged me tighter and whispered back, "Ok."

With that I stepped back, smiled at both of them, and made my way out of the room and upstairs to search for my bedroom for the night. I knew that by the morning they would have all their problems solved. They would discuss all night how bad they were for each other and how toxic their relationship was until one of them leaned in for a kiss and all the problems would suddenly disappear.

This trip hadn't changed how Damon felt for Elena but it had changed how I felt about Jeremy. Maybe not changed but definitely opened my eyes to the truth. I didn't love him anymore and though I hated the idea I needed to break things off with him. I sent him a quick text: _Can we meet tomorrow at the Mystic Grill to talk? _I changed into my night clothes, brushed my teeth, and climbed into the bed to wait for him to text back. Almost immediately after my head hit the pillow he text back: _Is this about Damon and the fact that you didn't tell me you were in pain?_

I hung my head. I felt so bad for keeping it from him, for keeping it from everyone. I text back: _No. But we can discuss that if you want. Can we just meet there at about 2? _All he wrote back was: _Fine. _He was mad at me and come tomorrow at 2 he would be madder. I simply accepted it, turned off the lamp, and let the darkness take me over.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

I slipped on a pale blue silk spaghetti strap shirt, a white skirt that started in the middle of my stomach and ended at my knees, and some white sandals. I slung my bag over my shoulder and made my way down the stairs. The house was silent. I assumed Stefan was somewhere out with Caroline and that Damon and Elena were still in bed doing…well I didn't want to think about what they were doing.

I got to The Grill at 1:55 and Jeremy was already there waiting for me. I walked up to the table and Jeremy jumped up to give me a kiss on the lips but at the last minute I turned my head so he could kiss my cheek. He sighed and took a seat. As I sat a waitress started walking our way but I just shook my head and she quickly turned back around.

I lowered my head and drew in a breath as I tried to collect my thoughts but Jeremy started talking before I could come up with the words.

"So are we going to talk about your road trip with Damon? Or how he actually fixed your problem? Elena told me you're not in pain anymore…how?

"Jeremy…it really doesn't matter. It got fixed and that's not why I asked you here."

"I want to know how it was fixed. And why Damon didn't tell Elena either?"

"He didn't tell her?"

"No he didn't. He wouldn't discuss anything from your trip. All he told her last night was that he had fixed it and they were still broken up. Then he basically kicked her out. What the hell happened and how did he fix it?"

I rubbed my hands down my face. I did not want to do this. I guess I did owe him an explanation though.

"He took me to this old witch and she called to my magic and now it's back; she also…" I took a deep breath before I continued, "bonded Damon and I so that I am physically and mentally connected to death all the time."

His eyes had grown two times their size and his mouth was hanging open. "How long do you have to be bonded to him, Bonnie?"

"Forever," I whispered under my breath.

"I can't believe you would do this, Bonnie! And without discussing it with me first. I don't know if I can even be with you after this."

I hung my head and looked up at him through my lashes. "Jeremy…."

"Oh my god. Are you breaking up with me? Is this because of Damon?"

"No of course not! This has nothing to do with Damon. We are bonded, that's it. We still hate each other. I'm breaking up with you because we aren't working. Jeremy can you honestly say you love me as much as you used to?"

"Yes, yes I do."

"Well I'm sorry I don't. We're over, Jeremy. I hope one day we can at least be friends." Before I could finish my sentence he stood up and walked out of The Grill without another word or glance. I wiped the tears off my face. I was sad. It was true that I didn't want to be his girlfriend anymore but we had always been friends and I was afraid we never would be again. I got up and walked to my car before I made my way back to Whitmore.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

Being back at school and being able to just focus on tests and deadlines was weird. I kept waiting for the pain every time a supernatural passed through me but nothing happened. I kept waiting for a new big bad to show up now that I had my magic back but the world was eerily quiet. That did not however mean that everything was ok. Jeremy had practically run to Elena to rat Damon and I out and for a week now she had been blowing up my phone to talk about the bond. I had not only avoided her calls and texts but I had also been staying at my grams instead of in the dorm so I didn't have to explain anything to her. I had sent her a quick and simple text: _The_ _bond changes nothing and shouldn't affect your relationship with Damon_. She sent back: _Well it does_. I, however, didn't want to discuss what that meant hence the **avoid all** **things Gilbert game** I had been playing for a week now. Caroline had stayed out of it altogether, choosing not to take a side and had actually been pretty secretive about her life in general lately. I knew she was seeing someone but no one, not even Stefan, knew who it was.

On top of all that drama I hadn't seen or talked to Damon since we had gotten back to town but that didn't mean he wasn't around. I could feel him everywhere I went. I could feel his anger, his passion, and his loneliness. Every emotion he felt was intense and consuming and at times would make me feel like my knees were going to buckle. I also had been having dreams about him…no not dreams, visions. I would close my eyes at night and see his past life. I now knew that he got his eyes from his mother, that he had been particularly close to his governess but that his father had fired her and it devastated Damon. I knew that after his mother died he had become an avid reader to escape the real world and when Katherine came along she offered him the adventures he had only read about. I would also have these weird visions of Damon and I being way friendlier than I was comfortable with and when I would awake in the darkness I would be covered in sweat and it would feel like my soul was torn in half. I craved him and I knew logically it was the bond but it didn't stop me from satisfying myself with thoughts of his hands and mouth.

The good part about the bond was that it intensified my magic. I was strong and getting stronger every day. My visions were intense and fire wasn't the only element I could control anymore. I contacted Eleanor and she told me that Damon and I were basically sharing strength and that it would make us both formidable foes. She also let me know that if at any time I wanted help with my growing powers she would be on the first flight out. I didn't ask her about Damon but before I could hang up she said 'And yes just like your powers the visions and longing for Damon will intensify until you do something about it.' She then hung up without a second thought.

It had been a week and all I could wonder was Damon feeling everything I had been feeling. I decided to send him a quick text to open dialog between us: _Hey._

Thirty minutes passed and yet I heard nothing from him. A part of me knew that he had chosen to ignore me as soon as we finished bonding but it didn't hurt my feelings any less. I gave up trying to pay attention to some b-movie I had gotten from redbox and put Supernatural on for background noise while I studied for an upcoming test.

I had been studying for a solid 2 hours when my eyes began to droop so I put down the books and turned everything off before making my way to grams bedroom which I redecorated recently and made my own. I slid my pajama pants down so I was only clad in a thin white t-shirt and navy blue panties and then snuggled beneath the mountain of blankets.

I had barely been asleep for an hour when I heard the tapping against my window. I exited the bed in a sleep fog and threw back the curtain and was met with milk white skin and eyes that had been haunting my dreams for days. I didn't give much thought to my attire…I just quickly opened the window and whispered a small, 'Come in.'

After Damon entered my room he threw his leather jacket on the overstuffed flower print in the corner and started making his rounds around the spacious room. He still hadn't looked at me or spoken to me and I felt as if my skin was on fire from waiting for the honey filled sound of his voice. He finally stopped pacing the room and took a seat at the end of the bed with a heaviness that seemed like his shoulders were carrying an invisible weight. He placed his elbows on his knees, sighed, and stared intently at the red wood floor.

"Damon," I whispered while picking at my nails in a nervous habit but his eyes didn't budge from the floor.

Eventually after what seemed like an eternity he whispered something to me. It was low and if I hadn't been standing so close to him I wouldn't have heard it.

"Take your clothes off and come here."

I jerked back as if he had slapped me. I sputtered a 'what?' and he finally lifted his emotionally charged fathomless eyes to my face. "Take your clothes off and come here," he repeated.

"Damon what are you talking about?"

He chuckled and shook his head as if I were an innocent child who knew nothing of the world. "We both know about the dreams. We both know that we crave each other like a candle craves a flame. I need you Bonnie and you'd be a liar if you said you didn't need me too."

My mouth was hanging open and I was breathing heavily but I said nothing to his accusations. I never expected for to admit what I already knew. I needed to bond with him in more ways than one. My soul was locked into his but it wasn't enough. I needed his mouth on mine, his hands intertwined with mine, his most intimate appendage inside of me. I needed…we needed to be one in every possible way and until it happened we would feel these massive holes in our chests where our hearts were supposed to be.

Damon smiled a small smile that barely lifted his lips and extended his arm towards me.

"Take your clothes off and come here."

I reached out towards his hand, a flame that would swallow me and turn us into a bright burning blue, and accepted my fate as our fingers laced together.


	6. Chapter 6

I am so sorry this took so long. I've been sitting on half of this chapter for awhile now but I didn't like how it was going so I refused to put it up. Lately though I've had so many great reviews and messages that have asked for a new chapter of this so I wanted to deliver. This does not quite go the way you guys may have wanted but I'm happy with the way I did it. Hopefully I won't disappoint you all with this chapter. Let me know what you think. Also I may have made Eleanor way too developed but God do I love her! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Diaries, its characters, or storylines. I only own this idea, original character, and storyline.

Chapter 6

I was terrified as our hands made contact. A part of me knew that I was making a mistake but the other part of me wanted him so bad that coherent thoughts were becoming difficult. He pulled my gently on his lap and I automatically laid my head on his shoulder. His hand slipped beneath the back of my shirt and began to rub my back in feather light touches as my hand made its way into his shirt to rest above where his heart should have beat. As soon as our flesh met we both let out sighs of completion. I had been anxious and it had felt as if my skin was too tight for over a week now and I hadn't known why but now it was perfectly clear…he was my center of gravity. He was my other half. And I was starting to honestly question if we had always been soul mates and the bond had just forced us to take notice. It didn't make much sense especially since we had both committed our hearts to the Gilberts and that we had less than a stellar background but as his hand ghosted over my spine and his mouth lowered to mine I knew that we had always been destined. That didn't take away the fear however. I jerked back before his mouth could settle on mine and lowered my head before trying to explain myself.

"Damon…I…well I…"

He lifted my face so our eyes could connect before whispering, "I know but you can trust me. I would never hurt you."

And I knew he meant it. I knew in my heart of hearts that he would rather die than hurt me. I nodded and stood to my feet before slowly removing my shirt. With his heightened eyesight I knew he could see every curve and blemish of my skin but the full moon outside, bleeding light into my room, aided him. Instead of moving to make contact with my naked flesh, he merely stared at me. He memorized every bit of my naked flesh before extending both his hands to me once more. I took them eagerly and he pulled me to him before lowering me to my bed. He moved the hair from my face and finally placed his soft lips on mine. Our mouths didn't duel for power but merely worked together as if our tongues had met countless times in the past. He sat up and looked down at me with longing in his eyes as I brushed his hair back and smiled softly.

I could honestly say that I never expected for my first time to be with Damon and I'm sure he never expected to be that man but here we were and we would deal with the consequences tomorrow. He stood from the bed and all while retaining eye contact he removed his clothing until the moon light was fighting to touch every bare spot of his marble perfection. As he came back to me I let my legs fall apart so he could fit exactly where I wanted him and our lips met hungrily. His hand slid down the soft swell of my stomach to the apex of my thighs and he slipped my panties down, past my thighs, calves, ankles and feet, before his fingers ghosted across my nub. I let out a sharp gasp at the contact and held on to his shoulders tightly as two of his fingers slipped into me and his mouth searched out the space between my shoulder and neck. It wasn't like Jeremy and I hadn't made it this far already. We had done quite a lot…just not the final deed but something about the feel of Damon's hands on me was driving me insane. I was close to falling over the edge…my breathing was coming in short puffs and my pelvis was jerking upwards meeting his fingers thrust for thrust when Damon's phone started going off.

He paused but after the ringing stopped continued like nothing had happened. Only a few seconds later it went off once again and though I didn't want to admit it, I knew who it was. I didn't stop Damon though and he hadn't stopped either though I'm sure he also knew who it was. I started falling back into the spell he was putting me under when my phone started going off, Elena's ringtone screaming at me. I pushed at his shoulders and he barely resisted. I slid from underneath him and sat up while pushing the hair from my face and answered her call. I could feel him behind me staring holes in my back as he waited to see where this conversation was headed.

"Hello?"

"Hey Bon…"

"Hey. What's up? It's kind of late."

"I know. I'm sorry. Look, first off I want to apologize for how I've been acting lately. Damon and I were just in a weird spot and I was taking it out on you but I know that the bond won't change anything. You only did it to ease your pain and as your best friend I should support you. I honestly don't know why I was going crazy."

"Yeah I don't either….."

"I guess it's because I was worried that you and Damon would become closer but that was stupid, I mean you two can barely stand being in the same room and I guess I was also worried it would make a reconciliation between Damon and I pretty hard but that wasn't true either."

"It wasn't?" I started breathing heavily while thinking about what her next words would be. I knew Damon was still behind me but he had gone completely still and I could feel the anxiety and nervousness rolling through him.

"No. I was just being stupid because we've been having so many fights lately. He actually just left. We worked everything out and we're going to try again but take it slow."

"Oh…that's good I guess." My eyes quickly filled with tears and they slipped easily down my face leaving streaks in their wake. I felt Damon lift from the bed and could hear shuffling as he put his clothes back on. "Look, Lena I have a migraine so I'm gonna crash."

"Yeah. Of course! I'll call you tomorrow and check on you, ok?"

"Yeah, ok." I hung up and quickly stood up, removed my robe from the hook on my closet door, and slipped it on before turning to look at Damon who didn't even look ashamed. His face was emotionless and cold. I ran my hand through my hair and sniffled as I tried to stop more tears from coming. I refused to let him see me weak ever again.

"You and Elena are trying again?"

"Bonnie I can explain…"  
"Explain what? How you patched up things with my best friend, the love of your life, before coming over here to screw me out of your system?"

"Bonnie we both know this weird obsession with each other is this stupid bond. I had no idea it would be this intense but we have to do something about it and let's be honest getting horizontal is probably the best option."

"And then what, Damon? You just go back to Elena with my virginity in tow?"

"I love her Bonnie….."  
"What the fuck do you know about love, Damon Salvatore? You've never loved anyone but yourself in your pathetic life? You are a monster and I have never felt so ashamed of myself. I actually let Eleanor convince we were soul mates!" By this point I was screaming and tears were streaming down my face and Damon was in shock as he stared at me with no words passing his lips. "But you aren't my soul mate. I refuse to believe that you are. You are no one's soul mate…no wonder everyone prefers Stefan."

His eyes immediately filled with anger and he ran at me, slamming me into my closet door. He didn't touch me, just placed his hands on either side of my head, probably from fear that he would hurt me. "You don't know anything, Bonnie Bennett."

I wiped a stray tear from my face. "I know that if you ever come near me again I will set you on fire and this time not even Elena herself will be able to stop me."

He jerked back and then walked to the overstuffed chair for his leather jacket but turned back to me after slipping it on. "This feeling…this intense feeling between us is not just going to go away. We will eventually have to do something about it…"

"I am going to do something about it. I'm going to remove it."

"It's not that simple Bon."

"Well then I will just create some magical buffer so we can go on about our lives. I'm sure Eleanor knows something that could help and then you can spend all of eternity with Elena and I can move on and get married and find some spell that will allow me to have children…I can continue the Bennett line, something I couldn't do with you."

His eyes flared with jealously and anger. "So you're just gonna find any guy with a high sperm count and replace me?"

"I'm not replacing you Damon…..I never had you." I sat back on the bed and refused to look up at him. "You know where the door is, please let yourself out." I slipped under the covers and turned my back on him. He lingered in the doorway like he desperately needed to tell me something but eventually I heard his heavy boots retreating before the slamming of the front door. As soon as the door latched I let the flood gates open and I cried and sobbed into my pillow for an hour before meeting a heavy nightmare filled sleep.

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"Yes?" Eleanor sounded quite cheery for it to be 7 in the morning.

"Hey. It's Bonnie. I'm sorry to be calling so early."

"I know who it is, Bonnie. What's wrong?"

"I need a spell and since you've obviously lived for centuries I just assumed you would know what to do…if you actually meant I could ask you for help anytime?"

"Of course I did. What kind of spell?"

"Some type of buffer or a blunt essentially."

"So you want to weaken a spell without actually removing it. Do you think that's wise?"

"You know what happened don't you?" I sat my coffee cup down with a thud on the island and then sat down on the black stool that accompanied it.

"I know that there have been a few bumps in the road with Damon and you have now reached the conclusion that you two are not soul mates."  
"That's because we're not. Look I know that you, for some insane reason, believe we are but we're not. We're mortal enemies by design and personal enemies by circumstance. I hate him, Eleanor and all he wants is Elena. I can't do this and I won't do this so please help me."

"I can fly out by the end of the week. Think you can hang in there until then, kiddo?"

A warm smile graced my lips at the nickname. "I definitely can."

"Good. See you then. Be strong." The phone went dead and I blew out a hard pent up breath as I let the exhaustion start to take over. I walked back to the living room, laid on the couch wrapped in a blanket and fell into a deep slumber, so I was not aware of a certain blue eyed devil walking into my house two hours later to watch me closely. I was also not aware of said vampire rubbing hard knuckles over his heart as he tried to understand how he could want to be with Elena but still love me so deeply.

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Caroline had been rambling on for 15 minutes straight and though I loved her, I wanted her to get to the point so I could go about my day of sulking. It had been five days since I had thrown Damon out and I hadn't heard from him since. I hadn't tried to contact him and had avoided every meeting of the reject Scooby gang that I could. Everyone kept questioning why I was only willing to discuss our little Traveler problem via group chat but I just kept saying that I was buried in school work and it was easier for me to do it that way. I ran my hand through my hair and tried to concentrate on studying for my history test next week while Caroline gossiped about the inner workings of our little gang. The hard chair under me barely gave any comfort but working at a desk was the only way I could concentrate. I was happy with the decision to move back to Whitmore especially now that Elena was constantly at the boarding house.

"So now everyone's freaking out!"

"Wait, what? Why?"

"Bonnie have you listened to anything I've said?"

"Um…not really. I'm sorry Caroline; I just really need to cram for this test."

"And I understand that but this is super important."

"Ok, ok, fine. Start over. What happened?"

"The traveler's have been giving Stefan and Elena visions of what would have happened if they had met as humans and needless to say it has everyone on edge…Stefan, Elena, Damon…everyone!"

"Why? They aren't real visions. And obviously she picked Damon so I don't understand why everyone is so worked up."

"Well because Stefan and Elena seem pretty happy with what the visions have shown them. And they have been spending more time together, to and I quote, 'Discuss the visions.'

"But you think it's more than that?"

"I think that there is still unfinished business between Stefan and Elena and that the only reason she chose Damon in the first place was because she turned into a vampire and didn't recognize herself anymore."

"I mean I guess that's a possibility but that doesn't mean she and Stefan will get back together. Too many things have happened. They don't work anymore."

Caroline shrugged her shoulder and looked down at her shirt that she began to pick at. "Some people that you think wouldn't work actually kind of do…"

I turned slowly in my chair towards her and gave her an intense glare. "And who exactly are you talking about?"

"Stefan and Elena of course…"

"Or you and a certain original vampire?"

Though she still hadn't looked up I could see that her eyes had become glassy. "You think something's wrong with me don't you?"

"Because you're attracted to Klaus?"

"Because I'm more than attracted to Klaus…"

"Sometimes we fall for people that we never would have guessed we would. We can't explain it and are even a little ashamed of it but it doesn't change the feelings. If you have real true feelings for him than I support you. I may not necessarily understand it but I've always supported you, Caroline Forbes. I won't stop now."

She sped over to me and nearly knocked the wind out of me when she wrapped me in a hard hug without even lifting me from the chair. She leaned back and gave me an earnest look. A look I recognized as the one she gave me before letting me know she knew all my deep dark secrets. "You know you can talk to me about anything, right, Bon?"

"Of course I do." She sat down at the edge of the bed closest to me but didn't break eye contact once.

"Ok. Well then how about we talk about you and Damon?"

"How about we don't…"

"Bonnie I know something's going on beyond just a simple bond. You're hurting and all I want to do is help but you have to let me in first."

I put my head down and started picking at my nails to calm me down. "The bond is a lot stronger than we initially thought."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that we're linked. Essentially one being in two bodies. I can constantly feel him…his anger, his happiness, his frustration. But on top of all of that it's like I'm split in two and it's killing me. I miss him Caroline like I've never missed anyone. I want him in every way that counts and I can't have him because he belongs to Elena. I don't know what to do…"

"Does he feel the same way?"

"I thought he did. He came to my house about a week ago and we almost…um…"

"Bonnie….." Her mouth fell open and she stared at me in shock.

"I know. I know. But we didn't because it turns out that he was basically trying to just rid me of his system so he could start playing happy home with Elena again. I kicked him out and haven't spoken to him since."

"That's why you keep avoiding all of our meetings?"

"Yeah. It's a mess and I just want to fix it and move on."

"How are you going to do that exactly? Fix it I mean."

"The witch that bonded us in the first place said she would help me. She's going to help buffer it somehow so that we can function without feeling like we're torn in two."

"And if that doesn't work?"

"Then I'm removing it all together and dealing with the pain. I can't be connected to him anymore like this, Care. It's too hard and I hate it. I hate caring about him, needing him and him just walking around like I don't even exist. I just want to go back to how things were: us hating each other and only working together when it's necessary to save the world once again. Speaking of that I should get going."

"Why?"

"She's arriving soon and I want to clean up the house a little before she gets there."

I packed up my books, slung my bag over my shoulder and started towards the door but before I could get there Caroline was in front of me. She hugged me tight and whispered in my ear. "Everything will work out Bon. You'll see."

I nodded, patted her back, and walked out of the dorm.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

I pulled into my driveway but refused to exit the car. He was sitting on my porch and I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to speak to him or see him but I knew I couldn't just stay in the car. I grabbed my bag, got out and slammed the door behind me before walking the short distance to the front porch. I didn't even stop to acknowledge him. I walked up the three steps and started unlocking the door as if he wasn't behind me, staring holes into my back.

"You're really not even going to acknowledge me?"

I simply dropped my head and whispered, "What do you want?"

"Will you set me on fire if I say I wanted to see you?"

I turned around to look at him as anger licked at my veins. "Probably. You need to leave Damon."

"Come on Bonnie. I miss you and I know you miss me. You've been avoiding me and I want us to at least be friends. Maybe just being around each other will help."

"I don't want to be around you. I want you to leave me alone and for some reason that seems to be hard for you. I'm not going to let you use my body to scratch your itch so get in your car and go."

"It's not like that…"

"Of course it is. You are itching to be around me because the bond is being ignored. Both of our bodies are going crazy because of it but my pride is more important than this bond Damon. And on top of that I'm sure the visions that Stefan and Elena have been having helped you find your way here."

Damon's face became cold and tight. "We're not talking about that."

"Why, Damon? Because you know the little connection you have with Elena is being tested and you're scared that once again someone is going to pick Stefan over you? Well guess what? I'm not going to embrace you and make you feel better about yourself. I refuse to be your second choice…you know how that feels right? It feels horrible. I won't be anyone's second choice ever again."

"Bonnie…" He walked towards me and I backed up against the door. My back pressing into it like I was trying to disappear. I didn't want him to touch me. If he touched me, I would break. I missed him so badly and I knew if I could feel his lips on mine for even a few seconds that my heart would stop beating so wildly and my soul would feel like it finally fit in my body. I also knew that I could never truly have him. Even if his relationship with Elena failed he would never choose to be with me. I wasn't an olive toned brunette…I wasn't good enough but I desperately wanted to be. This bond was driving me crazy because I had gone from mild acceptance to longing in 0.5 seconds and I couldn't figure out if it had always been there underneath the surface or if it was just a result from the bond. On top of that I knew that Damon wasn't falling as hard as I was and that made it even worse.

He stood as close as possible to me without touching me. His body heat warmed me from the inside out and his lips looked fuller and softer up close. I could feel the want in his body fighting with the annoyance he felt from our conversation and I suspected the annoyance he felt over the bond. His hands rested beside my head on the door and I could tell he had never wanted to touch someone so badly. A simply hand hold would probably suffice but I knew if he could have more maybe it would give him the fix he needed to get him through the next couple of days. He slowly lowered his head to kiss me…his actions so deliberate and controlled it was if he was a snake about to strike at its prey. I breathed in deeply and held my breath in anticipation but right before his lips could make contact with mine we heard a throat clear. Damon jerked back and we both looked for the interruption.

And there she was…Eleanor. Her hair, which was now a pale pink, was pulled up into a high bun, tortoise shell fifty style glasses took up most of her face and she was wearing black high-waisted shorts, sandals, and a black button up sleeveless shirt with a pattern of white cats on it. She didn't exactly look like a centuries old witch with enough power to burn the world down but I could feel her magic pushing at my chest and stealing my breath.

Damon face was a mixture of confusion and anger. "What are you doing here Eleanor?"

"I was invited. What are you doing here?" She folded her arms and waited for an answer. She was tiny but the power in her made you want to drop to your knees.

"Nothing. Just visiting Bonnie."

"Hmmm ok. Well the visit's over. Bonnie and I have business to take care of."  
Damon shook his head in defiance. "You can't remove this bond, Eleanor."  
"I can do whatever the hell I want to, Damon Salvatore." Damon quickly exited the porch and approached Eleanor. There was no space between their bodies and I could feel the need to rip Eleanor apart worming around inside Damon's body.

"You're not removing this bond Eleanor or you and I are going to have a really big problem."

Eleanor didn't even flinch. She merely lifted a thin eyebrow and balled her hand into a fist. As soon as she completed the action Damon dropped to his knees while clutching his chest and blood started to leak out of his mouth. I made to move but Eleanor simply looked at me and I was frozen in place. She bent down so she could make eye contact with him and whispered but with our connection and my heightened abilities I could hear every word.

"Don't threaten me Damon. It won't end well for you. I get it. People have always cowered when you threatened them and rightfully so…you are a big bad vampire. But I'm the monster that monster's like you hide from. I've taken down vampires three times your age with the flick of my wrist and without breaking a sweat. Now, I like you and I have a soft spot for Bonnie so I'm trying to reign in my temper. How about you do the same?" She unclenched her fist and Damon let out a breath of relieve and fell on the ground. Eleanor simply walked around him and up the steps. She hugged me like nothing had happened. "May I come in? I brought tea and I figured we could have a real talk about your bond?"

I wanted to pay attention to her but I was still watching Damon closely. She touched my shoulder and I jerked my eyes up to hers. "Don't worry Bonnie. He'll be fine. I would never kill him…I just wanted to bring him down a peg." With that last comment she walked into the house and with one final look I followed behind her. I knew Damon was healing…I could feel it.

Eleanor went into my kitchen, sat her bag down on the table, and pulled out some homemade tea from her garden. I sat at the island and watched as she filled the kettle and started preparing everything.

"So Eleanor…about the bond? How are we going to weaken it because I have some ideas…"

"Bonnie, I know that you think that, that's what you want and I'm not saying you're wrong but I want to tell you my story before you do. I was once bonded to someone…a vampire. And it led to heartbreak and pain. I lost my family and my life. That bond destroyed so much but it also showed me what love is. Bond's can be made with any couple. The strength of the bond depends on the love between that couple. Real love. True love. The love that was already in their hearts before the bond was created. The longing you feel for Damon isn't about your body…that longing is your soul. The myth that we were split in two and separated and that now we are searching for that other half is true. I should know…I found mine. I'm going to tell you everything and then you can decide what you want to do. Deal?"

I nodded and accepted the tea cup she gave me. "Deal."

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

I put the car into park and turned to look at Eleanor. She looked eager to meet the rest of the gang but I was nervous. She wanted to tell the entire group about her bond experience to shed some light into each of our situations, but I knew once she told this story it would cement the fact that Damon and I were more connected than previously stated. However, I trusted Eleanor and I trusted that if she wanted to do this it was for a good reason. I let out a heavy sigh and exited the car. Instead of Eleanor following behind me, I followed her, and she simply walked into the boarding house as if she owned it. And frankly it looked as if she did. When she stepped into the living room all conversation ceased. Elena and Stefan looked shocked, Caroline automatically turned to me with a questioning expression, and Damon's face flooded with anger.

Stefan stepped in front of Elena, something that was not lost on the rest of the room, before approaching Eleanor. "Can we help you?"

"No thank you Stefan. But I can help you, if you would take a seat. Actually could everyone take a seat?"

Elena looked around Stefan's shoulder at me. "What's going on Bonnie? Who is she?"

Damon stood up and stared at me with a hard glint in his eyes while responding to Elena. "She's the witch that bonded me and Bonnie and she's not invited here." He turned to Eleanor with steady gaze.

Eleanor laughed darkly. "We don't want a repeat performance of this morning do we, Damon?"

Damon's jaw clenched but he kept silent and took a seat. Eleanor's smiled lifted slightly. "Thank you. Could everyone please follow suit? I have a tale to share."

I nodded at everyone to let them know that everything would be okay. They all took their respective seats; Damon in the corner with a tumbler of bourbon, Caroline and I on one sofa and Stefan and Elena on the other. Eleanor smiled sweetly and then swept her hand in sweeping motion which made a black medium sized cushioned chair appear beside her. She took her seat which was pushed far enough back that she could see all of our faces.

"Ok so who's ready for a story?" No one answered. She was only met with curious expressions. Eleanor continued on like she hadn't asked a question of the group. "A little over two hundred years ago I died. Well my first body died. My name was Victoria and I was a seeker; the same kind of witch that I am now. We're practically extinct."

Elena slid to the edge of the couch. "What exactly is a seeker?"

"Most witches are only one thing, maybe two at most but only one is superior. There are three types of witches: conjurers who can create spells and manipulate elements, oracles who can see into the past and future, and necromancers who can connect with the dead as well as bring them back if they're strong enough. Bonnie is primarily a conjurer though she has dabbled in the other two which actually suggests that she may be one of us." She smiled at me warmly and I blinked back in shock. "I assume the only reason you're not as strong is because there has been years of dilution in the form of human blood in your family tree. That started sometime ago. Seekers are all three types of witches shoved into one body and two hundred years ago we were dying out. And well the other supernaturals weren't making it better. They were murdering us. We were strong. We could destroy the world; hell just one of us could level a town if we tried hard enough so they were working in the shadows and plucking us off one at a time. I was the youngest with the most power. The elders were afraid of me. Some elder who had supreme oracle powers said that she had a vision that I would have two loves: one of darkness and one of light and one who could lead me to heaven or one could lead me to hell. So to keep me on the right path and to preserve our kind the elders arranged a marriage between me and another equally as strong male seeker." She took a deep breath and put her head down in shame. It was the first time I had seen her uncomfortable.

"But to be truthful I was already in love. I had been in the woods one night and it was a full moon and a pack of werewolves caught my scent. I was seventeen and I was about to die and out of nowhere a vampire saved me. His name was Ethan. He was beautiful. Dark and mysterious with one dark blue eye and one stormy gray eye. I fell in love instantly. He was a part of a family, albeit a make-shift family, of vampires and they wanted to eradicate us. Both of our families hated each other but we kept seeing each other in secrecy. Eventually he asked me to bond with him. He wanted us to be stronger but he also wanted us to be together forever. The bond was intense and consuming but we didn't care." Eleanor eyes filled with tears but she sucked in a shaky breath to keep them at bay.

Damon cleared his throat and took a deep gulp of bourbon before he spoke. "Is there a point to this story?"

Stefan whipped around to stare Damon down. "Stop it Damon." Damon rolled his eyes and got up to pour himself another drink but promptly took a seat afterwards to listen to the rest of the story.

"Either way it didn't end well. Another seeker found out and told everyone and then Ethan's family found out and we were forbade from ever seeing each other again. The elders removed the bond and it turned out that we really were soul mates. When they removed it I felt like I was dying. It felt like my heart was being ripped from chest, one artery at a time. I couldn't take it so…..I killed myself."

I felt my mouth drop open. "What?!"

"I killed myself. I drove Ethan's dagger through my heart because I just needed the pain to stop. About a century later I was reborn. I had all the same memories and the magic traveled with me but the bond was still gone. And it's funny because I've never met him as Eleanor but I miss him and I dream about him. I'm still in love with him but I found out after I was reborn that once he found out about my suicide he slaughtered my entire village. Breaking the bond…it kills you because you are essentially ripping yourself in two. But I made the decision that the world deserved to exist without the love of Eleanor and Ethan so I've cloaked my land for as long as I can remember and he's never found me. Unfortunately I am not currently on my land so…yeah. The point is soul mates aren't common. Typically you never find yours but once you do you can't imagine life without them. There are two sets of soul mates in this room and if you guys aren't willing to admit it, it's going to end badly. Yes…loving him lead to my death but a century later and a new body and I still reach out for him in my sleep. It doesn't get better and you can try and fight fate but only you will suffer for it."

With those parting words she walked out of the room. Everyone in the room was still and no one wanted to make a comment about who the particular soul mates in the room were.


	7. Author's Note

So I was already contemplating whether or not I wanted to continue this story and then I got a review that basically made up my mind for me. I was told that I am straying from Damon as a character though to be honest I was aware that I had changed the dynamic between Bonnie and Damon and had plans for that. But the point is, is that I don't ever want to destroy characters or disappoint people who take the time to read my stories. If I'm not giving you guys the best and most authentic characters then there is really no point in my writing. So I'll be taking a hiatus from this story. It's the best choice. One: I am not well and half the time I can barely get a chapter out. And two: maybe it will help me get my head straight when it comes to my fanfiction. I love everyone who has favorited and followed this story and I am especially grateful to the ones who take the time to leave a review. People who don't write fanfiction and only read it really have no idea what it means to get a good review or hell a review at all. When you take the time to write something and people don't respond it hurts and it makes you feel like your efforts are being wasted. It's even worse when someone tells you that what you are putting out isn't good enough. But if that is the case I am making the best decision. I don't ever want to deliver subpar writing. I think we all get enough of that with Julie Plec and Caroline Dries. I haven't decided about my two other stories but I won't take long to make the decision. Thank you so much!


	8. Chapter 7

So as everyone knows I was supposed to be going on hiatus from this story. And I was intent on that but then I got a few messages from some of the best readers a girl could ask for. They basically told me that they believed in me and that I shouldn't let one person bring me down. They were right. I let my own insecurities make me weak and when I read that review it hurt and I decided that I must be churning out bad material. Not all of you think that however and a great deal of you have been there since last summer when I put up the first chapter. I would like to extend a sincere apology to all of you who actually liked this story. I was selfish and I'm truly sorry. I don't know if you guys will like this chapter but I do and that's what matters. And that's what should have mattered the whole time. I need to keep reminding myself of that. Thank you again and enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own vampire diaries, its characters, or plots. I only own my own original plots and stories.

Chapter 7

Someone was knocking on my door. It was 7 in the morning. I hadn't spoken to anyone in the group except for Caroline in over two weeks. Eleanor was still staying with me and we had been trying to figure out how to eliminate the traveler problem. We knew that the only logical choice was to kill them but if we were being honest we didn't want to have to do something that drastic.

Caroline and I had only been discussing school and the destruction that the travelers were creating. I didn't know what else was happening. I hadn't spoken to Damon either and he wasn't speaking to me. The plus though was that Eleanor was teaching me any and everything about magic that she could. She had a beautiful connection with nature. There were times when she would go out at night and stare at the moon and I swore they were having a conversation. I wanted to learn everything I could from her which is why I was entertaining the thought of leaving Mystic Falls with her. She was intent on discovering and understanding different forms of magic; she wanted to travel the world and learn more now that she had lowered the guards around her and left the fortress of her home. She had always been slightly terrified that Ethan would find her if she was exposed but it had been two weeks and nothing had happened. She invited me along and I was thinking about it but something was stopping me; it was obvious that, that something was the bond. The idea of being that far away from Damon was painful but it was something I might have to do for my own sanity.

The knock came again…sharper and wilder this time. I threw the blankets off and rushed downstairs. Eleanor was already standing in the hallway staring at the door intently when I came into view.

"Something's wrong." Her brow was tightened and her mouth was drawn in.

I just nodded before flipping the lock and opening the door. Damon and Caroline were standing on the other side with distressed looks on their faces. "The travelers are after Elena and Stefan. Half of them want their blood to activate their spell and the other half want to kill them so that they can eliminate the possibility. We need your help."

Eleanor just snorted out a laugh. "I'll go get dressed."

"Where are they?" I asked.

"They're hiding out in the old witches house since it's pretty much in the middle of nowhere but I don't think they'll be safe for very long." Caroline said while biting her lower lip.

"Ok. Go get them and meet Eleanor and me at the boarding house. We'll come with supplies."

Damon flooded the doorway. "Supplies for what exactly?"

"To protect them. Eleanor and I will just spell the house until we can figure out how to get rid of the travelers. We'll be there soon. Go ahead and we'll meet you."

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

When we drove up to the house no one was outside. I expected the travelers to be there but thankfully they must have come to the conclusion that no one would logically hide out in the open. When we got inside Caroline was on the phone in a corner whispering to someone. Elena and Stefan were on the couch, sitting very closely and speaking in hushed tones. Damon was nowhere to be seen. I came into the living room fully and Elena finally lifted her head and looked at me.

"Hey Bon….."

"Hey….." I sat down on the opposite couch and tried not to be uncomfortable with the situation. After Eleanor's confession, Elena and I hadn't been in the same room for weeks. I didn't know where we stood and I didn't know what her current situation with Damon was. Eleanor had blunted the bond but it was still there. We were still connected and I could feel the bond pushing at the blunt constantly trying to break it. I swore I could also feel Damon's eyes on me everywhere I went. I would wake up in the middle of the night and expect to see him sitting in the corner of the room watching me intently.

"Bonnie let's go ahead and put up the wards before they arrive." Eleanor said.

"Alright." I followed her out. She stood in the front of the house and I went around the back and we began to chant as we placed magic infused stones around the house. It would keep out anything and anyone with magic in their bodies except for the ones already in the house, the ones doing the spell, and anyone invited in afterward.

When we walked back in Eleanor walked back to the kitchen without a word. I sat back down on the couch. Stefan and Elena were still whispering back and forth and Caroline was now sitting on the opposite side of the couch texting somebody. I barely made contact with the couch before Elena got up and approached me.

"Bonnie do you think we could go somewhere and talk?"

"Um yeah I guess so." I followed her upstairs and into a random bedroom I had never been in. I closed the door behind us and turned to her with a quizzical brow. "So what's up?"

Elena sat down in a huff on the bed and pushed her hair behind her ear. She had started flat ironing her hair again and the straight look reminded me of the old Elena before she got overtaken by darkness and her love for Damon. "I want us to talk about the bond and about what Eleanor said about soulmates."

"Ok." I sat down beside her.

"Why didn't you tell me how strong the bond had gotten?"

I shook my head and lowered my eyes. "It wasn't something I could really share with you, Elena. I was falling for your boyfriend. I felt horrible for that. I felt like I was betraying you."

"Well I have to admit, it hurts. I love him and knowing that he might be your soulmate is not something I'm dealing with very well. I would like to know if he is…actually your soulmate."

"Elena I don't know how to find that out. This thing between us could just be the bond. Actually I'm pretty sure that's all it is."

"Couldn't you just remove it and then you would know? Right?"

"Elena if we remove it and it turns out we're soulmates it's going to be horrible. We're going to feel like we're dying. I don't want to go through that much pain. Hell the whole reason this even happened was because I was already in constant pain. Do you want that for me again?"

"No! Of course not. I just need to know. I need to know if my relationship with Damon is pointless or not."

I stood up and started pacing before turning around to face her again. "Why are you even questioning your relationship? Is it because of this thing with Stefan?"

"There's no thing with Stefan….."

"I know about the visions Elena. I know you've been spending all your free time with him. Is the reason you're questioning your relationship because of the bond or is it because you've realized you're still in love with Stefan?"

Elena's eyes quickly filled with tears and she dropped her eyes to the floor. I dropped on my knees so I could see her face better. "Lena?"

"What's wrong with me?" She lifted her head a little; her eyes were red rimmed and tears were making a steady track down her face.

I grabbed her hands and squeezed them. "What do you mean?"

"I thought Damon was what I wanted. I left Stefan for him. I was convinced that he was made for me but lately the only person on my mind is Stefan. I miss him. Those visions reminded me of why I loved him in the first place."

I immediately silenced the room, something I should have done in the beginning. "Why?"

"He makes me feel human. Even when I was human I always felt like I wasn't enough, like I could be better but when I was with him I felt like the rawest form of human. I felt like a bundle of nerves connected to the world. He makes me feel every burst of energy in my body. And even now that I'm a vampire he still makes me feel that way. When I'm with him I don't feel like a monster but when I'm with Damon I feel like that's what I have to be. I have to be extreme and adventurous. I can't just be me. I don't know what to do, Bon."

"Do what will make you happy."

"Even at the expense of others?"

"I will tell you what I told Caroline. I support you. I've supported you for years and I won't stop now. Ok?"

She nodded and hiccupped around the tears. I stood up and gave her a big hug. A knock sounded on the door and we separated.

"Come in."

Caroline poked her head around the corner. "Are you guys excluding me again?"

"Of course not Care. Come on in. Close the door behind you though cause the silencing spell only works that way."

Caroline closed and locked the door. "Why do you guys need a silencing spell?"

Elena automatically turned away so I answered for her. "Elena is still in love with Stefan."

"Well duh!"

Elena's head whipped around and she stared at Caroline. "You already knew?"

"Um…yes! I'm friends with you and Stefan remember? And I'm observant. Both of you are completely in love with each other and I was worried that you guys would remain oblivious forever. Pretty sure Damon knows too."

Elena threw her hands up. "Great! So everybody knows but me."

Caroline sat down on the bed with us. "Pretty much."

"Wait, why did you have to tell Caroline that you support her decisions? What aren't you guys telling me?"

I turned from Elena to Caroline and raised my eyebrow. I decided to speak for her. "Caroline's in love with Klaus."

"Bonnie!" I shrugged my shoulders.

"We need to start being honest with one another. I hate that we're keeping secrets from each other. That's not us." I grabbed each of their hands and gave them a squeeze. "Can we agree not to do that anymore?"

"Agreed," they both said. They laid their heads on each of my shoulders and that's how we remained until Stefan came to get us for dinner.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

As the girls were having a heart to heart Eleanor was making her way into the kitchen to speak with Damon. He was seated at the island sipping a dark amber liquid.

"Damon….."

His mouth drew up in a sneer. "Eleanor….."

She gave him a thoughtful look and then pulled the other stool around to the other side of the island before taking a seat. She waved her hand over a part of the counter in front of her and a teacup with what smelled like rose tea appeared in front of her. She began taking small sips of the hot liquid while staring at Damon. Not one to ever back down from a challenge, Damon made eye contact with her and held it. This went on for a full two minutes before Damon broke.

"What?!"

Eleanor smiled slowly and sat her teacup down. "Let's talk about the bond and Bonnie while we're at it."

"Yeah I don't think so." He began to lift from his stool but Eleanor merely lifted a finger in his direction and then at the seat and he collapsed onto it.

"Please stay seated. It would be a lot easier to have this conversation with you actually in the same room."

He gritted his teeth but didn't try and lift from the stool again. "What do you want to discuss?"

"Why you're fighting this bond so much. Damon I've seen what your life was before you became a vampire. You were meek and sad and all you wanted was for someone to love you despite the flaws. Now you have a chance at the best thing that could ever happen to someone. You're soulmate is right upstairs and you're running like a dog with your tail tucked between your legs. Why are you so scared?"

"I'm not scared of anything, Eleanor. I used to be meek and sad…now I'm the one to look out for and you're right, my soulmate is upstairs. Her name is Elena Gilbert."

"Wrong! Elena Gilbert is not your soulmate though her soulmate does have the last name Salvatore. She was never your soul mate. And it's sad to me that both of you were fighting to keep a relationship going that never should have started. I know in the beginning, right before the bond, that you were eager to help Bonnie but as soon as the bond settled and you became aware of the feelings that you had kept buried you bolted. You acted like a little scared boy when placed in front of the darkness. And that's what loving Bonnie is. It's uncharted darkness. You knew that no matter what you did, Elena would forgive you. She would always be there. With her and with Katherine you could be the monster and the fuck up. You could embrace all the bad and they would always look the other way. With Bonnie you would have to open yourself up. You would have to let her in. You would have to give her permission to see the human that's still hiding behind the demon. And you are terrified that if you do she'll run. That must be terribly scary. So you decided it would be safer to stick it out with Elena. You know she loves and will love you despite your flaws but you don't know if Bonnie could. I believe that she can. I believe that she could heal you. With her you would finally be worthy. So Damon are you brave enough to enter the unknown? Can the little boy in you walk into that darkness and accept it and embrace it? Or are you going to continue being a coward who has nothing to live for?"

Damon had been staring at her the entire time. His eyes were glassed over by the end of her speech and he began blinking rapidly while turning away so she couldn't see that she had moved something in him. He remained silent so after a few seconds she picked up her teacup before making her way out of the kitchen.

"You don't have to answer me. Just answer those questions for yourself."

He nodded and she left the room.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

The rest of the day was spent cooking and eating. There was obvious tension among everyone, well everyone except Caroline and Eleanor. They appeared to be fine, while Stefan, Elena, Damon, and I seemed to be on edge for varying reasons. The travelers hadn't come by nightfall so around 11 everyone decided we needed some sleep. We made sure the house was nice and secure before all taking a bedroom. Damon and Elena chose separate bedrooms without even discussing it, something that was not lost on the rest of the group.

It's now 3 in the morning and I had been in a deep sleep until I heard the first big bang. My eyes popped open and I breathed hard while looking around the pitch black bedroom. Another big boom happened and I jumped which made every light in the room come on. The banging became steady and was increasing in tempo and loud voices could be heard outside. My bedroom door crashed open and Damon came striding in. His hair was a messy halo around his head. He looked around the room with a crazy look in his eyes. I threw the blankets off and got out of bed on shaky legs.

"Damon what's going on?"

A loud boom came from outside and the windows in my room shattered, glass shooting across the room. I screamed and Damon came barreling at me before taking me down to the floor. I wrapped my arms around his middle and he wrapped his arms around the top of my head to protect me from the glass. After a few seconds of no activity he lifted his head and looked at me. He brushed the hair back from my face.

"Are you ok?"

I took a moment to access and then answered him. "Yeah I think so. Are you?"

He laughed a dry laugh. "Immortal remember? Though I do think I might have caught a hunk in my back."

I started shimming underneath him to get a better look but he remained firmly in place. "Damon, let me see it."

He shook his head slowly and lowered it until he was beside my ear. "Just one more minute."

I tensed and opened my mouth to tell him I didn't understand when a throat cleared. We looked up to see Caroline and Eleanor standing in the doorway. Caroline merely lifted an eyebrow. Damon jumped off me at the sight of them and I slowly lifted myself from the floor.

Eleanor stepped forward. "Well I think it's safe to say that the travelers have arrived. Our wards should hold them off. We're much stronger and have older magic on our sides. That won't stop them from exploding every window in the place or trying to destroy this house with manmade products. Stefan and Elena are already downstairs and I suggest we join them and try and decide what to do."

I looked at Damon's face when Stefan and Elena's names were mentioned, and though his mouth became a little pinched, he didn't seem too out of sorts about it. I was instantly curious why but now wasn't the time. We all followed Eleanor down the stairs and into the living room. Stefan was holding Elena's hands and whispering something to her. She nodded and he wiped a tear from her face before pulling her in for a hug.

Damon cleared his throat and they jumped before breaking apart. Damon began talking like he hadn't witnessed anything.

"We obviously can't stay here. We need to pack up whatever we absolutely need and get the hell out of here. So witches can you create a Potter like diversion while we make our escape?"

Eleanor stepped up with a smile on her face. "I think I can come up with something."

"That's what I like to hear. Caroline, can you and Elena go upstairs and pack everyone's clothes? Vampire speed is a must. Stefan and I will get the cars ready."

Stefan nodded. "We should take two cars though. Any more will just slow us down. Your car and Caroline's SUV?"

"Deal. You go ahead and start up her SUV and Eleanor can you start thinking of a way to get us out of here? Bonnie could you help me out?" He pointed to his back where the glass was jutting out, beneath his right shoulder blade.

I looked around the room and locked eyes with Elena who looked slightly shocked that he had asked for my help and not hers but she just nodded and made her out of the room and upstairs to pack up everything. Caroline followed her and Eleanor and Stefan left the room to take care of their duties.

He sat on the couch at an angle so I could reach him better. I rubbed my hands on his back, below the glass. "I'm going to go get a pair of scissors." I started walking away but his hand shot out to grab me.

"Why?"

"I'm going to cut your shirt off so I can get to the glass easier."

"Don't worry about it." He put his hands around the collar and ripped the shirt down the middle and threw the shreds on the ground.

I stared at the pieces of fabric. "Okkkkkkay…hold still."

He nodded and faced ahead again. I wrapped my hand around the chunk and placed my opposite hand flat against his back to give myself some leverage. I took a deep breath. "One, two, three….." I jerked hard and ripped the glass from his back.

He grunted and tensed before rolling his shoulders to shake away the pain. I stared at his back and watched the skin mend itself back together. "There you are." I dropped the hunk of glass and started to leave the room to find Eleanor but he sped in front of me.

"Can we just have a minute, please?"

"Alright."

He crossed his arms and looked off to the side, refusing to make eye contact. "I don't know what to say or what to do. I love her, Bonnie. I love Elena but I'm starting to wonder if I just transferred that love from Katherine to her. I assumed that what I felt for Elena was real because it was the same way I felt for Katherine…overpowering and consuming. It's not like that with you. The way I feel for you is uncomplicated and easy. I feel right about it. But you are not for me. You're too good. There's no way the cosmos, or whatever, made you for me so I've decided to let you go. We can get the bond removed if that's what you want….."

My eyes glossed over and I blinked rapidly. "And you and Elena? Is this just to get me out of the way so you can be with her with no complications?"

He shook his head and lowered his eyes. "I'm leaving her too. She wants to be with Stefan and I'm done fighting the inevitable."

"How?"

"I heard your conversation earlier before you spelled the room. And then Eleanor and I had a very interesting conversation about you. I'm not happy about any of it but I've decided to try and be better."

"I'm not sure I want to remove the bond anymore…"

Damon opened his mouth to respond but Eleanor came running back in the room. "We have a good 20 minutes to get out of here. I immobilized them."

"Elena? Caroline?" They both speed down the stairs with bags in their hands.

"We're ready." Elena said but she kept looking at us with serious looks. She must have heard our conversation.

We could discuss it later however because right now we needed to escape while we could. "Good. Let's go."

We ran out to the garage where Stefan had Caroline's and Damon's cars running; he was sitting behind the wheel of Caroline's. We all stopped and shot awkward looks at each other as we wondered who should ride with who but shockingly Elena was the one to speak up.

"Stefan I think it's a good idea for you to drive Caroline's car and the three of us can ride with you." She indicated herself, Caroline, and Eleanor. "Bonnie and Damon, why don't you two just take the luggage. I think you two have things to discuss anyway."

Damon and Elena had a silent conversation with their eyes and then nodded before Damon began loading up the backseat. I climbed into the passenger seat and Elena took shotgun in Caroline's SUV while Caroline and Eleanor took up the back. We opened the garage door and sped out of there while the travelers were immobilized on the ground surrounding the boarding house. I wasn't sure where we were going but Damon seemed to be following Stefan as if they had already worked it out, when though, I wasn't sure.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

The travelers weren't following us. It helped they had been immobilized but it also helped that Eleanor and I had put a magical barrier around the cars. It wasn't the strongest spell but it had been hiding us from any outside magic for the past hour. Damon and I had remained silent the whole time. The music was low creating just background noise. We hadn't uttered one word to each other but I could feel him watching me out of the corner of his eye. I finally got exhausted with waiting and turned my body fully in the seat so I was facing him.

"How much more time do we have before we get there, wherever there is?"

He brushed his hand through his hair. "Around 2 more hours according to Stefan."

"Good. So how about we discuss the bond and what we both want?"

"Bonnie what I want and what's best are two different things."

I turned the radio off so that the car was free of distraction. "Best for who? You or I? I can make my own decisions, Damon. I'm a grown woman. I have thought this out and I know what I want. Do you? Because you keep changing your mind. One minute you want me, the next you need Elena and only her, and now you're letting both of us go. What the hell is do you want?"

I heard him growl deep in his throat. "I want to want Elena. She's all I know. I've been in love with that face for over a hundred years. I want things to be simple but ever since I bonded with you they aren't. I want you…hell I need you but I don't want to screw up. I can't screw this," he moved his hand back and forth between us to indicate our relationship, "up."

"What makes you think you will?"

"Bonnie, you are good. You're the personification of good. You have literally died to save other people. I'm not good. I never have been. Even when I was human I was a screw up. I destroy everything around me and I don't want to destroy you. And you can say that, you can care for me despite all that I've done but one day you're going to wake up and realize that I'm a monster and you're going to run. I don't know if I could survive that. It's better for everyone if we just keep our distance especially for you."

"Stop telling me what's best for me. I know what's best for me. You think I'm overjoyed that you're my soul mate? I wasn't at first. We don't exactly have a stellar history but I want to know you, Damon. I want to know everything about you. I want to know who you were before your father destroyed you and before Katherine got her talons in you. I want to know him. The human Damon. And I'm not going to bolt or beg you to change. I've seen your worst and I'm still willing to see your best. Why can't you just let me?"

He moved his eyes from the road and stared at me for several seconds. "What if you decide I'm not what you want? What if you stop caring about me? People tend to do that."

I slipped my hand into his and squeezed. "I don't care about you Damon. I love you."

He eyes snapped shut and he took in a shuddering breath before directing his attention back on the road. He didn't remove his hand from mine but he went silent. After a couple of minutes I turned my head and looked out of the window and then I heard him whisper under his breath.

"Let's give it a shot then."

I smiled and squeezed his hand once more to let him know I had heard him but I didn't respond. He hadn't said he loved me back but I could wait. I just wanted the chance to love him and to show him what love could be.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

We drove through a small, sleepy town and after exiting the town, about fifteen minutes later we pulled up to a two story beach house that was only a few feet away from a small beach. The house was beautiful and looked fairly new. Damon got out and walked around to open the door for me.

"Whose house is this?" I asked after shutting the door behind me.

Stefan turned to me with a bashful look on his face and then answered the whole group who all looked curious, including Damon. "It's the house I bought for Elena." Elena's mouth fell open and she turned to him with a shocked look.

"What?"

"You always told me you wanted a house on the beach so I bought you one."

"When?"

"A little bit after you became a vampire. I wanted to give you some sense of normalcy but then you and I broke up and you got with Damon…" He trailed off. Elena didn't even consider who was watching. She jetted over to Stefan and wrapped her arms around his neck while whispering in his ear, 'Thank you.'

Damon stepped away from me. "Let's go inside. I think it's time we all have a much needed talk."

We all walked into the house with our heads held low. After depositing our bags by the front door, Eleanor and Caroline began to walk out of the room but Damon stopped them and asked them to stay. Caroline and Eleanor stood off to the side with crossed arms and uncomfortable facial expressions. Stefan and Elena sat on the same couch but with a gaping space between them. I sat on the opposite couch with my legs folded underneath me. Damon stood and faced the three of us.

"Obviously some things have changed and I think we should discuss them."

Stefan scooted forward on the couch. "Damon, I -"

Damon held up a hand to stop him before he could finish his thought. "Don't even try and tell me it's not what I think. It's obvious that things between you and Elena have changed. It helps that I practically heard Elena admitting just that yesterday."

Elena slapped her hand over her mouth and her eyes quickly filled. "Damon I'm so sorry. I'm just confused….."

"No you're not. You're not confused. You're in love with my brother and have been this whole time."

Elena shook her head and more tears tracked down her face. "I'm so sorry."

Stefan looked at her and scooted closer to her before he laid his hand over top of hers. "Is this true? You still love me?"

She lifted her soaked eyes to him and nodded slowly. Stefan nodded back and then looked to Damon. "What does this mean? Are you going to try and destroy things yet again?"

"No, Stefan. I'm not fighting your relationship with Elena anymore. I never should have. I'm a selfish person…always have been. But even through everything you two have been through, even with Elena becoming a vampire, and even through the sire bond you two never stopped loving each other. She's not mine to have…she clearly never was. I won't be coming between you two again."

Elena sniffled back a few tears. "Really?"

"Really. You two should try again and Bonnie and I are going to try, if everyone is okay with that….."

Everyone looked shocked and turned to me on the couch. Caroline spoke up for the first time since we entered the house. "You two are going to try and be a real couple?"

I nodded with a weak smile. "I know it's weird but we think we owe it to ourselves to at least try."

Eleanor stepped forward. "Finally! I swear putting the four of you together has been hell. But things are now how they should be. And Caroline did you do what I told you to do, also?"

Caroline nodded with a broad smile on her face. At the quizzical expressions on my and Elena's faces, Caroline spoke up. "Klaus and I are going to try and see what we could be. I know, no one will understand but I need to give it a shot."

Before anyone could open their mouths Eleanor spoke up. "No one gets to judge her. All of you have made less than stellar options in the love department. Everyone is now trying with the person they should have been trying with all along and I suggest we all pick a room and get some sleep. I'm sure it won't be long before the travelers follow us and we need to be rested when that happens."

Everyone agreed and made their way upstairs. Now that it was out in the open Elena and Stefan didn't try and hide their happiness and eagerness to try again. They decided to share a room and though they weren't going to just start sleeping together again, I think they were excited to share a bed. Caroline and I chose a room with two twin beds. Damon took a bedroom by himself that was right across from mine. We clearly wanted to be close to each other, the bond was eager for it now that the blunt had been removed but we, ourselves, weren't ready to share a bed just yet. Eleanor took the attic bedroom by herself and away from us all.

DBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDBDB

I awoke yet again with my heart in my throat. Someone was banging on the front door. I looked to my left and Caroline was already awake and sitting up. We both got out of our beds and opened the door slowly. Stefan and Elena were already standing in the hallway, hands clasped tightly. Damon came out and came towards me, brushing the hair back from my face.

"Ok?" I nodded and then looked back towards the steps where the sound was being carried up from the front door.

Eleanor came down the steps from the attic space and walked straight for the steps leading to the first floor. She spoke to us but didn't turn back to see if we were following.

"Four of you are vampires and one of you is a witch. What are you scared of?"

"Smartass." Damon remarked before grabbing my hand and following behind her. The rest of the gang made their way down but we still stayed back a few feet from the door in case the travelers were at the door. Though it wasn't their style to knock, more like throwing big, concentrated balls of magic at us.

Eleanor brushed her pink hair back from her face and I felt her magic increase like it was charging up for a fight. She rubbed her fingers together and small sparks came from them. She flipped the bolt on the door and pulled the door open and froze. No words came from her. I was sure she had been hurt or something because she seemed to have stopped breathing. I stepped forward. "Eleanor?" Before I could make two steps Damon grabbed my hand and pulled me back. I then heard a male voice from the other side of the door.

"Are you going to let me in or continue to stare at me?"

Eleanor took a gigantic step back with her hand over her heart. She was shaking slightly and I was more than a little worried. We could, however, see the visitor now. He was tall, at least 6'2". He had broad shoulders and a lean body. He was wearing nothing special, just a dark gray v-neck, dark blue jeans, and black boots. His hair was ink black, he had sharp bone structure and a strong jaw. But the most interesting and fear gripping part about him was the fact that he had one blue eye and one gray eye.

He stepped over the threshold and closed the door softly behind him. I hadn't even thought about the fact that he could enter without an invitation now that Elena was dead. He smiled a slow, sharp smile.

"Hello. I'm Ethan. Nice to meet all of you."


End file.
